Thursday, September 25, 2014

time.....

finally time to sit back and try to breathe for a while.. been stressed to the max lately and its been making me physically ill.. migraines to the point of just wanting to cry but knowing if i cry from the pain it will only make it worse. throwing up because any little bit of movement i make i am nauseous, body temperature going to low, my temp was 95 before i got it to start going back up to normal. i wish i could handle things better without getting sick like that :( upsets me a lot because when i feel that bad i can not function at all, movement hurts any noise hurts opening my eyes hurts, i cant eat or drink, which means i cant take anything to help my headache go away because the pill and the drink with make my nausea worse and then i will just throw it back up, yesterday i was totally at my breaking point. sick the day before from stress and yesterday was no one's fault but getting stuck sitting 40 minutes away from my house for 5 hours made my anxiety and stress levels go through the roof, so i was emotional as hell and i just couldnt handle anymore, i didnt know how long i was going to sit there so i debated for quite a while about starting to walk home but i knew if it took me 40 minutes to drive there going 60 mph i would never make it home walking, so when i finally got home, i took a nap and felt better when i got up only to get up get on facebook and have a message yelling at me telling me if i have a new dog it goes against hud and blah blah, we didnt get a new dog i commented on an old picture from 4 years ago with a dog we use to have that a friend of mine has now and posted updated pictures... i hate when people dont look at shit, it drives me crazy, so im sure when i called the person that i had an attitude but dam my plate is full enough as it is i dont need to be yelled at for something that isnt even going on, or a dog that i dont have anymore... just aggravated me more... so i am trying to keep my stress down so i will not end up in the hospital, thankfully my doctor called me in some nausea pills that will dissolve under your tongue so i can take of the nausea with out me having to drink something and then end up throwing up.. that way when the nausea goes away enough i can take something to help my head. so now that things are calming down, i am going to be trying to keep stress down and hopefully it will work. 

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